And so rather than getting sliced, I began a gig.

This blog is evolving into complete nonsense...but I think I like it. After a long break, the story continues...
The gig started out with a tiny kick here and a twist of my arms there, but the longer I danced, the higher my kicks became. The pirate lord was too shocked to do much but stare for the first few minutes, and so, with one great Russian style kick, I knocked him out cold, for he was no taller than an obese leprechaun. I slashed the ropes of the other captives with my ragged toenails and then proceeded to threaten my opponents by placing my most fearsome of all toenails to their throats. In their fright and desperation they surrendered the ship to their former prisoners. Victory would have been ours for the taking but as luck would have it, those I had freed were none other than the Sixth Sense Gang.